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Saturday, April 24, 2010

Err.Gonna flop for stupid village by the sea test.I didnt even finish reading the book.weell i stopped at page 111.but which it means i actuually stopped like seriously reading at page 15 only.I skipped all the way to page 110.Im such a asshole.I hate myself.I hate myself for being so lazy.TSK.Err.I was so damn freaking emo-ing state in class ytd.Din noe what was wrong wifm e.Of maybe i knew.Sometimes,,i wonder.Why is her fren but not her friendlier to me.If only she was her fren.Funny women-a girl who sits besides me in class that makes me angry almost every single time on my right.She said.xxxxxxxxx is not worth your time,just forget about her and si xin.Give up.I was like how to.i wish i could.but i just cant do it.I cant help it.Shes in our school.I see her almost everyday.I donno whicheva part of me makes me have this xxxx feeling towards her.

what we could have been, 6:40 AM.

Monday, April 19, 2010

Im totally gonna floop for fucking summary test.i didnt read thwe instructions clearly and summarised thw whole passage when only paragraph 7 to 11 needed.What a stupid dumb kid i am.I think besides another fren of mine.Im the only retard in thw whole universe who didnt see such instructions especially it was even in bold words.IM such an asshole.ARGH.

what we could have been, 4:55 AM.

Today,i just saw carnation in the canteen.well,as usual always me doign the hi-ing and stuffs the initiative stuffs.shes stil lthe same-as shy or maybe as rude as to ignore people.i feel heart-brokened.KLeh.I need to go very close to look at her closely.thats very important and i need to do it fast.For some reasons.I wrote a letter to her last night and i plan to give it to my messenger or our messenger to pass it to her.She keeps hanging out wif this girl a talll tall one and if im not wrong they are from different class but yet so damn freaking close.i see them together almost everytime i spot her.HMMM.can someone help me or telll me how to make carnation be less hostile to me or less idoitic to me???????????Im really getting upset.Its like i try so hard to do all the initiative stuffs and shes still giving me the cold attitude.But i dont blame her.Maybe cause she looks rather fierce and im those kinda kekekeek type.Ignorant i mean.Help me please someeone.Her birthdaes 1st of may and thats a holiday.pretty jealous but its so coincidence that it falls on the celebration of labour day.Arghh.i want to give her a birthday present but i donno what she likes.

what we could have been, 4:49 AM.

Saturday, April 17, 2010

Im started to lilke this girl.In fact,i donno whether is those kinda like wanna be great frens or just close frens is satisfying for me.Or is it-Girl like GIrl.Les?i dont wanna be a les.I mean theres no harm but i donno why.Shes really v.cute.Shes callled carnation.at ffirst,i didnt noe that was her name.I thought the name was stupid.But when i finally met her in sch,evything just seemed to changed.I knew her through a fren of mine.And when i saw her,i went up to her fac and asked her for her number.It was just like "like at first sight".please dont misunderstnad me.Im not a les.But,im not sure whether the next sentence denies it."whenever i see her or whenever i see her smile,i feel extremely happy.Not knowing whether to say,my heart just melts.Well,ever since this thing started,i have been telling my fren everything about this or her.And i talk very loud so almost the whole class noes about it.frens that are not in the same class or not close to me,you dont noe how crazy i am and the actions i do or how i react whenever i see her.For example,that day,she wrote back a letter to me and i was happy for the whole day.Not even the person that sits beside me can make me angey or sad.I really like her alot.but she doesnt reall ytalk to me.In her blog,it was clearly stated that when this happens,its usually cause she doesnt like a person or shes shy.After seeing that,i really wonder.What if she finds me irritating?I just wouldnt noe how to react to it.But one thing that makes me a little positive about this is that she also stated its usaally of the usually that shes shy.Shes the shy and only talk to other ppl when she noes others well.I have always been the one initiating to sms her.And i donno if she finds me irritating cause of that.Hope she doesnt.Well,she initiated smsing to me twice and i was really happy.I dont noe how to express those happiness.If im sad or angry,i just need her to smile at me or talk to me.But i only know her for like 2 weeks and that kinda talk im referring to is the normal talk i do to my goodfrens or bestfrens.Only 2 weeks of knowing her.Its impossible.But when time passes by,i hope it happens.And when it happens,i will be ultra happy.Done saying.

what we could have been, 5:48 AM.

Today,i ate the most wonderful corn in my life.No joke.it was really the best.it was just to yummy for anybody to resist.i lurve it to hell/At one short i ate 4-5.Its quite a big portion.Whats more,it must be gigantic for a tiny weenie gir like me to digest in my tummy.HAHAHX>.

what we could have been, 5:43 AM.

A few days ago when i went to braddel mrt station to take mrt home.ON my way i bought bubbletea.and i forgot that i wasnt suppsoe to drink or eat anything in the mrt station.AND I WAS CAUGHT!!!Orh WTF.the fine is 500bucks.Wow.that guy or wadeva security guard caught me like just in a split second?i had to fill in some particulars form.and the offence number was 14 and thats my birthday.On the paper."A NOTICE OF OFFENCE OR SUMMONS WILL BE SENT TO YOU IN DUE COURSE."and i dont dare to tell myparents but still told my dad.I hope nothing will be sent to my house.Hopefully.

-DIGRESS-
Btw,ONEWs birthday[from shinee]is on 14 december also.HAHA.Claudia told me its "WO NIU".snail.its really funny.

UNLUCKY LIKE FUCK!!!!!

what we could have been, 5:32 AM.

Steph told me that having a group tuition is not effective.80%agree.whenever i just tell her about it.she justs gets irritated by me.and so called we start a mini argue.its like.whos the one hafvving tuition?and when i tell you the tuition sucks you just wouldnt believe.and when my grades coomes out bad,you scold mme and say i waste money.can anybody tell me wad to do??whatever i do is wrong.Arghh.Such an ass.Like why do i bother to tell you this when this kinda fucking thing makes us quarrel?IMA SUCH A DUMB ASSHOLE.whenver im trying to tel you something,you just dont believe it.Dont you get it,im just trying to tell you that you cant decide everything for me.I need a life too.Cant i object to what i dont want to do or don like.And whateva that is,i detest it.Just a moment of peeace i need please.Im begging you.I noe im not that kinda that have self discipline.IM a stupid,idoit and nonsensical girl.[donno how spell or got this word anot].IM NMOT A FREAK THAT DOESNT NOE HOW TO DEICDE ANYTHING OR DO ANYTHING FOR MYSELF PLEASE,MIND YOU.But,i noe you lurve me alot.I just wanna say,sorry for all this things.Sorry.Forgive me.

what we could have been, 5:07 AM.